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Saturday, October 22, 2016

Chasing the dragon

So, I've had some strange times in my life and I've been talking to a therapist friend of mine and she said it might be a good idea for me to keep a journal.  Well, here it goes.

Gladys and me got back from a visit to little China today and it was not the best of days whatsoever.  Cass, the lead detective the the MacD (the Magic and Conjuration Department) of the local police, called me in on a case involving the smuggling of dragon eggs from the far East.  Turns out that they were being incubated and sold on the black market so that the little buggers could be used in "herbal remedies" for things like hair loss, virility, or as I put it "mystical ED pills."

Cass, Gladys, and I were following a lead to a known smuggler's den when I suddenly got a strange flash.  Did I mention I'm a psychic detective, oh and I work for Cass from time to time for a paycheck with the MacD?  Anyway, we were down near the fish market and I got a sudden flash of... something.  It was very hazy, but I could feel it drawing me to one of the nearby stalls.  Cass noticed my preoccupation and asked what was up.  I told her that I was getting something and to follow my lead.

I followed the, for lack of a better phrase, mental sonar to one of the stalls loaded with ice and selling red snapper.  Cass started to talk to the owner but something in me made me plunge my hands into the ice.  Things got a little crazy as the proprietor got, understandably angry with a strange guy just leaping hands first into his wares.  I was shuffling around so hard searching for the source of the signal I was getting that I wasn't exactly being careful and the cart that made up the stall wasn't the highest quality and one thing led to another and with all my fussing the front panel came off of the display spilling ice and fish all over the ground.  Cass reached for me but stepped on a slippery bit of fish and as she fell she grabbed the edge of the cart pulling it over.  The owner lunged at me and I jumped back into the stall behind me, which startled me and I grabbed the edge of it and ended up tipping that one onto the pile of ice and fish as well.  It was selling some kind of large catfish and before I knew it, I was on the ground up to my elbows in catfish.  Literally.  One slipped over my hand and up my arm until I was holding it like a puppet.

So there I am, working a catfish like a sock puppet and there's Cass slipping and sliding on ice and fish parts trying to get up while two men are yelling at us in Mandarine.  And what was the payoff, you might ask?  Well, it turns out that behind the first stall, the owner was keeping a jarred pair of fairies behind his stall, they are called Tian Xian Pei if my research paid off, for good luck.  They had been calling to me to set them free.

On the upside, Cass cited the man for illegal capture and imprisonment of sentient beings.  On the downside, we were no closer to finding the dragon eggs, we were covered in fish goo and smelled horrific, and the city had to pay for two new carts that had been destroyed on Cass's watch.  But at least Gladys got a kick out of it.

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